Thursday, June 5, 2014

The Joy Thief

So today is the day I get to play in the cafe, my child had finished her school and was playing with some of her friends, who often work in another department. My child loves to go work with them.  It is a thing of beauty. She loves to work, yes there is more chatter and more frolic but Little Miss Sunshine works with me all the time and she is a hard worker, even when her mouth is running. 

A few weeks ago I was too sick to work in the Cafe but she my 11 year old offered to go work in my stead. My friend thought she would be helpful doing the unskilled labor in the cafe, but soon discovered my DD is a budding cook. Well able to wield a knife, knows the difference between a dice a chop and a slice. My friend K mentioned to me the next week how astonished she was at my kiddos knowledge base of cooking and cleaning.

But today Little Miss Sunshine begged to go work with her friends, and since yesterday there was a work party, a call for all available hands for stuffing envelopes, I agreed she could leave my demise and go help with what I thought was a huge unfinished project.  Well when I opened my email tonight I discovered my assumption was incorrect. Apparently my kid participated in being annoying and was socializing to much and there was not enough work to go around.  I'm sure she was Miss. social... *sigh*

I look at this email and my heart breaks. I have been reading Smart Trust a trust based leadership book. I realized this email is a Joy Thief.  The Smart Trust book talks at length about how team work and trust breeds prosperity, energy and JOY. Stephen M.R. Covey does a great job explaining how a lack of trust in our culture is breaking down society.  I'm feeling it now. :-P nothing like a spanking email to get my attention.  

How can I sit my child down and say "Oh by the way you can't work with your friends anymore." because I felt schooled in an email.  I don't want to steal her JOY of work, her JOY of social community,  her JOY in serving others.  I have so much going on I'm really not in a place to know if my child will be available halfway through the morning because she had a great school day and is done. So here I am thinking of 2 helping hands that do not desire to sit idle,  but just now finding out spontaneity is not feasible to the work they have on hand, It must be scheduled. Dun dun dunn..  I totally understand, I get it, I sympathize! Never would I want to create more work in our already over worked environment.  But seriously folks from my window in the cafe I can see piles of weeding those idle hands could be doing with JOY...

I often get inundated with youngsters during Friday night prayer set up, I pick 3 or 4 and send the rest back to the meeting. If they finish their work early I send them back to the meeting, or let them get their hands on the good stuff first... For the scripture saith , Thou shalt not muzzle the ox that treadeth out the corn . And, The labourer is worthy of his reward. 1 Timothy 5:18 KJV  If they get  rowdy or out of hand guess what!  oh yes I send them back to prayer meeting.  I'm not all that popular with the children, one of them said sometimes I make her nervous... Sigh  I guess I need to work on my delivery... But if I don't need you I'm going to be honest and tell you. 

So here I blog discouraged my joy in abayance because...

I think I have figured it out it was the delivery... (my biggest failing)  instead of a call or a word in my ear,  I got policy, rules and regs. Smart Trust points out that falling back on rules and regs tells others you don't trust them to do the right thing, and my friends that is why my joy is feeling stolen.  But I will rest in the immortal words of my father "Feelings lie." so I don't always trust them. :-)

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