Wednesday, August 29, 2007

My Little Mimic

My little mimic

Today dd was all about being just like Mommy. We came to find out that she didn't own any black shirts and I didn't own any pink ones. So dressing alike would be difficult, Altho we both had grey shorts she refused to wear hers. "They are not pretty Mommy!" I'm beyond the pretty stage I'm all about comfort!

Little ones are constantly mimicking what we do. Shes been picking at her fingernails and I just realised either I'm mimicking her or I have been a poor example. I can't stand to have anything under my nails so I constantly clean them out.

Todays big argument was all about the "brassiere" yes that unmentionable undergarment. Maybe I should use the french version of the word bandeaux. but any way you spell it it was still funny and uncomfortable at the same time.
DD: "Mommy I want to wear one"
Mom: " No dear they aren't that much fun."
DD: "You do! and I want to be just like you"
Mom "Well you don't have the parts yet dearie."
DD "Yes I do Look, Right here!" Picture if you will a skinny child taking a deep breath and pointing to her last rib bones. It was so funny I burst out laughing. I think we need to study more anatomy in school.

I tried a diffrent tactic. I told her they don't make them in her size... but she wasn't buying what I was selling. You know that look of pure disbelife kids have, the little wheels in thier minds are turning I could just see it "Ya right... you alway say no to what I want, so this must be one of those times." I even let her try on some, but lo and behold they didn't fit, imagin that! DD is funny if it is "Not my size and to big" she refuses to wear it. Trying to get this to work for me... Failed. Her solution "Lets go buy one that is my size." sigh... out witted by an 8 year old. I was thinking if she only knew what wrinkles they made in her skin she would never put one on!

In our read aloud story today I read a song, so I sang part of it, so she would realize it was a song. When it came her turn to read for school, she sang the first 3 pages. I asked her to stop for a second since last week she told me shes not listening to herself when she reads. All I could think was this singing is all she is concentrating on and not listening to her self. But after 3 correct answers and detailed information about the story, I surprized her .. keep singing.. if you read and sing and you retain it, sing sing sing!!! heh heh heh she had that look "huh she likes it? This is supposed to annoy her"

So later in the day were sitting in prayer meeting I sat by my friend, her favorite "aunti," She begged to sit by her friend E. Eventually they got to sit by each other. He put his feet out, she put her feet out. He sat still, she sat still. He wiggled his fingers, she wiggled her fingers. Thank goodness E is the most polite child in the world. Can you imagine what would have happend if I put her next to someone hyper!

I need to remember everything I do is being watched her little mind absorbing good and bad habits like a sponge.
No wonder Mom and Dad were always happy to see us off. "Bye-Bye have fun! Don't call after nine at night" *wave* Whew now we can just be ourselves the kids are gone!

Sunday, August 26, 2007

I been thinking about anger

A few weeks ago we lost one of our precious dogs Hudson to liver cancer. Short of extreme measures and a large expenditure of money we do not have, there was nothing we could do. My daughter dealt with it by talking about swimming. I would ask her if she missed the dog and instead she natters on incessantly about swimming.

Then breakfast became a battlefield.
Mom: What do you want for breakfast this morning?
DD: Eggs!
Mom: Why are you not eating your eggs?
DD: I want toast! My tummy hurts…
Mom: Honi you asked for grape jelly on your toast now eat it please. DD: My Tummy hurts I want cereal.
Mom: your tummy hurts because you are hungry. Now eat!

Day after day after day the same thing every morning, if I say its wet outside she said its dry. If I say its hot outside she says its cold and goes out in 95-degree heat wearing a sweater. She of course reappears in 5 minutes saying, “I’m sweaty.” Well DUH!!! It’s hot outside. Picture me banging my head against the wall.

So following the sage advice of a wise woman, I stopped giving her options for breakfast because no matter what I put in front of this child she wouldn’t eat it and well soggy cereal doesn’t last for lunch and reheated eggs are kinds gross. My childhood memories are haunted with thrice reheated scrambled eggs, UGH! Can we say, “Eating a hockey puck would taste better?”

Usually by 11 am she is hungry enough to eat corn flakes. So how does this all relate to anger? I have noticed a trend maybe I have been half out of it but when I say “Honi 10 more minutes then you have to turn the game off. In 10 minutes when I ask for the game to be turned off she lobs the “anger football” at me... why is she mad at me, this is great because: I didn’t forget and made her turn the game off. My hubby comes in flustered and upset and I get to recive the “anger football” from him. Is he mad at me No… In all of this I realized I’m not the quarter-back I guess I’m the one who gets to catch it and can make a touch down with this anger football. But it’s hard work always reciving anger that should be directed elsewhere. I’m not the one who caused the problem but I seem to be the deposit box for it all.

I think this is something Moms just do. I did have a long talk with my DD. About how sometimes we are mad about something else and so were mad about everything, and how she is probably mad about Mommy letting Hudson die. And how for some strange reason it is easier to be angry than sad.

Ever notice how anger is justifiable, but sadness is frowned upon. And one day the floodgates open on my little one and all the ignored crying came pouring out. Real grief, real tears. Whew!

Saturday, August 25, 2007

Lost In Thought

I have this plan you see to take my kid the the moveis tonight Nancy drew is playing at the doller theater and I thought it would be fun. But like all moms I wanted to surprize her so I think how can I get her out of the house without her asking "where are we going for 20 minutes straight"

So I bribed my child with "going to eat at McDonalds" If she cleaned her room that wasn't "that" dirty. I know full well if I took her to Micky D's she would eat 3 fries, some reassembled chicken parts and a pint of catsup. She also would have a great time playing in the air conditioned play ground, considering it's been 83 degrees F. in the house for the last 6 weeks and the air conditoner has been running full boar all that time... (I don't even want to know what my next month bill will be) I knew she could use some play time not under the blazing sun. I knew I wanted that room to become something other than a state of chaos , and i would get her out of the house under the pretense of going out for dinner.

So Like all good Mommies I let her get on with her chores while I read internet postings. And I periodicaly checked up on her.
First check up: She has made her bed and her dolls bed and removed all the sheets from the pull out couch we use for guests that she was having fun sleeping in lately. Now I told her in the beginning she didn't have to touch the pull out bed and when the floor was safe to walk on I would close it up. Sigh... and what you may ask is she doing when I walk in... she is sitting stareing at a book... not reading it mind you just looking at the cover ...
She is Lost In Thought...

Mom redirects "try putting all your books away" and risks life closing up bed, bare foot steps on leggo. Note to self "wear shoes"

Second check up: Floor is clean in middle due to the fact she moved her little ikea bed accross the floor. It has effectively hidden the pile of junk on floor but of course one cannot get in or out of room with out acting like a monkey and climbing on the furniture. The books from floor are gone Yippie! Daughter is sitting stareing at zoo map yet again...
She is Lost in Thought

Mom rearranges the furniture so the local fire marshell would be pleased and comments nicely on books being put away. Catches myself cleaning her room and runs away, thinking if i keep doing it *for her* she will let me do it all and I won't get to eat the rest of her fries tonight. Because you know full well I will order the salad secure in the knowlege she will only eat 3 fries.

Third check up:
Its amazing her desk is clean!!! notebooks, pens, pencils and cd's are all put away, I almost faint from shock. Of course the dog is oblivious and sleeping on her bed that is groaning from the accumulated weight of stuff she has moved off her desk and floor. My daughter is stareing at a blue shirt that says "princess" that she is holding up and is yet again....
Lost In Thought

While I point out the fact that although the dog can sleep in the tiny space left on the bed she cannot and it needs to be all put away properly. I grab a stray books and start helping again I go behind her door (pls note book shelf is behind the doorway to her room) I close door so I can put book away and discover the leaning tower of Pisa recreated with books topped by Asland himself. Opening up the bookshelf door my worst fears are confirmed. They are almost empty I'm confused do I have this right we had 10 or 11 books on floor to be put away and now the books that were in the bookshelf are now on the book shelf ready to topple??? sigh.... I redirect child who is still holding blue shirt to put *that* in the laundry (always a safe place to put clothing from floor due to dog. DOG = dog hair on everything that comes in contact with floor) and put these books back where thay came from. Yes I did pull the tower down to floor level so they would not fall on top of her.

Forth check up
Her floor is clean the bed still needs work but my Mommie radar is working I spy with my little eye a pile of clothing and stuffed animals in a corner! I then go and open the door to her closet thinking altho the dog like to sleep on her bed.. the dog prefers to sleep in the closet.. yep sure enough nice unruly pile of playmobile, socks, underware, purses and notebooks.
and some how all the dressup clothing from inside the box have magicly removed themselves to next to the box. While I am making these discoveries she has been staring at the digital clock saying "my radio station is now 200" .... Once again Lost In Thought...

To make things easier I pull everything out and put in center of semi clean floor pointing out the collective homes for the big 3, Clothes = hamper, toys = bins, dress-up = dress-up chest. As I leave I attempt to shake the stray buttons from my feet but to no availe they're firmly stuck to the bottom of my feet. note to self remember to put on shoes and to put a lid on daughter button collection.

Fifth Check up is about to happen we have 20 min till we no longer have time to eat and go to movies and I have come to the conclusion that all she has really been doing for the last 2 and half hours is moving armfulls of stuff from floor to bed and back again while in between stuff moving she is staring at various articles that are to be found in her bed room. as I'm putting on my shoes she comes running out "Mom I cleaned my room!" Yes I do find about 10 errent items like shoes books and toys in her hamper but she quickly sets that to right. And she looks at me as says "Can we go to McDonalds right now!?" And I say yes In just a second because now
"I'm Lost In Thought"...