I'm Just a Country Girl

So we have moved, and were all settled in. I'm exploring the local environs and getting lost on the roads and finding my way again. It feels like our life has been on hold for months and we can now proceed with life again. I love the vistas here the sunsets you can actually see and the stars!! oh my how I missed the stars. Little Miss Sunshine and I have been taking night walks with our star chart. We are hoping for a really dark night so we can see the Milky Way.

My house is very pretty and I'm contemplating buying turf for the back yard that becomes a mud pit every time it rains... Oh yeah it rained in July In Texas! It was a delightful week of NOT 100 degree weather which I much appreciated. After a few weeks of no wifi (but what was on our phone,) we broke down and bought a hot spot. So I'm blogging on limited data, can't wait till the whole campus is done and we can sign up for connectivity again.

Meanwhile I'm doling the data out to the family in drips an drabs.

Its been a hard transition as the office hasn't moved yet so my Knight in Shining Armor is doing what he did in NY which is drive over an hour each way.  He said to me yesterday... I've realized I'm not twenty anymore. Ha ha ha!  So true.

I have been given the task of trimming the suckers off the trees and pruning.  I never realized just how many trees we planted.  Oh my!  It's like laundry in that it is a never ending job, but unlike laundry the surprises you find are way cooler.  Yesterday I found a birds nest with 4 birds in it. Glad of my hat... I pruned the suckers and skeedaddled so mama bird could come back and take care of her babies.   I also find huge spiders... ok not as big as Frodo faced but the size of a small egg is NOT uncommon. It's weird you have to be at just the right angle to see the webs. Then you notice this huge spider on the web, you shake the tree and it runs like lighting up it's ladder and hides under a leaf and you can hardly see it anymore.   Once again I'm thankful for my hat... I found a few spiders on me afterwards.  I'm getting used to them. Then again (as long as they are not crawling on me) I don't bother spiders and think of them as being beneficial insects.  Heres a good shot from http://www.spiderzrule.com This is what they look like.

I don't think they mind me since I'm always kicking up grass hoppers, and well these guys are so fast. A hopper gets on their web and they wrap them up in about 10 seconds flat. It's pretty cool to watch.  Since we have hundreds of grasshopper out on the "back 40" everyone these guys eats is one less that is eating the trees. I've also become Not a Fan of sap suckers... they are relentless, they seem to love one variety of oak we planted, poor trees.  

Well I have settled back into finishing up the last fews weeks of school from last year I had no idea we took off that much time. Ugh! I've been trying the workbox method for my eldest and she seems to love it. It helps her to see how much work she has to do, and once the boxes are done she is done.  Her best friend moving in 2 blocks away has also been a strong motivation for her to finish her school  on time. Now if I was just better at getting her to complete her chores.  This is a bigger house and mama needs help keeping it tidy!   

Ok next blog I'll show you my Ikea School room / crafting space. The kids love having a dedicated space for school and So do I! Also the work boxes help keep it neat! 

The Joy Thief

So today is the day I get to play in the cafe, my child had finished her school and was playing with some of her friends, who often work in another department. My child loves to go work with them.  It is a thing of beauty. She loves to work, yes there is more chatter and more frolic but Little Miss Sunshine works with me all the time and she is a hard worker, even when her mouth is running. 

A few weeks ago I was too sick to work in the Cafe but she my 11 year old offered to go work in my stead. My friend thought she would be helpful doing the unskilled labor in the cafe, but soon discovered my DD is a budding cook. Well able to wield a knife, knows the difference between a dice a chop and a slice. My friend K mentioned to me the next week how astonished she was at my kiddos knowledge base of cooking and cleaning.

But today Little Miss Sunshine begged to go work with her friends, and since yesterday there was a work party, a call for all available hands for stuffing envelopes, I agreed she could leave my demise and go help with what I thought was a huge unfinished project.  Well when I opened my email tonight I discovered my assumption was incorrect. Apparently my kid participated in being annoying and was socializing to much and there was not enough work to go around.  I'm sure she was Miss. social... *sigh*

I look at this email and my heart breaks. I have been reading Smart Trust a trust based leadership book. I realized this email is a Joy Thief.  The Smart Trust book talks at length about how team work and trust breeds prosperity, energy and JOY. Stephen M.R. Covey does a great job explaining how a lack of trust in our culture is breaking down society.  I'm feeling it now. :-P nothing like a spanking email to get my attention.  

How can I sit my child down and say "Oh by the way you can't work with your friends anymore." because I felt schooled in an email.  I don't want to steal her JOY of work, her JOY of social community,  her JOY in serving others.  I have so much going on I'm really not in a place to know if my child will be available halfway through the morning because she had a great school day and is done. So here I am thinking of 2 helping hands that do not desire to sit idle,  but just now finding out spontaneity is not feasible to the work they have on hand, It must be scheduled. Dun dun dunn..  I totally understand, I get it, I sympathize! Never would I want to create more work in our already over worked environment.  But seriously folks from my window in the cafe I can see piles of weeding those idle hands could be doing with JOY...

I often get inundated with youngsters during Friday night prayer set up, I pick 3 or 4 and send the rest back to the meeting. If they finish their work early I send them back to the meeting, or let them get their hands on the good stuff first... For the scripture saith , Thou shalt not muzzle the ox that treadeth out the corn . And, The labourer is worthy of his reward. 1 Timothy 5:18 KJV  If they get  rowdy or out of hand guess what!  oh yes I send them back to prayer meeting.  I'm not all that popular with the children, one of them said sometimes I make her nervous... Sigh  I guess I need to work on my delivery... But if I don't need you I'm going to be honest and tell you. 

So here I blog discouraged my joy in abayance because...

I think I have figured it out it was the delivery... (my biggest failing)  instead of a call or a word in my ear,  I got policy, rules and regs. Smart Trust points out that falling back on rules and regs tells others you don't trust them to do the right thing, and my friends that is why my joy is feeling stolen.  But I will rest in the immortal words of my father "Feelings lie." so I don't always trust them. :-)

Up To My Ears In Paperwork

Oh my I'm just up to my ears in paperwork, moving always motivates me to shred all this paper we have... Yet So much of it is actually irreplaceable. You know things like certificates you know how important those are... I bet your thinking star student certificates.. no I'm talking about certificates of adoption, citizenship etc.

When I first adopted I would lament Oh its so much paper work why can't they make it easier. Yet with every change and new adoption the paper work gets bigger. It reminds me of windows... its not a bug it's a feature, and really you do need all that code to make it work.

This time the new event is TB testing all the kids in this family. OH MY!!!
Sweet Potato never used to be afraid of needles but ever since her sister came home and was afraid of needles she picked it up for fun. Good Times... One day she heard me on the phone discussing the possibility of a pin prick and freaked out for the rest of the day. I had to put on my counselor hat and talk her down off the wall.

So I took her to the pediatrician to get her test placed. They don't have any... nor can I buy a vial and let hem keep it. They send me to the health department. I think well lets call the free clinic first and ASK before I drive for 25 minutes... 10 minutes on hold I get a very nice a man, Do they do TB tests Yes! canI get them for my kids... NO!!!  (You have insurance!) Great.... But my doctor sent me to you to get tests placed. I need them for a foster care adoption... he puts me on hold... when he comes back he has his supervisor who said YES! since you are doing this to become adoptive parents we can place the tests for you... But You will have to call back next week as we are out of TB stuff. So Ultimately it's a NO.... later as I'm driving past my family doctor (Do you know about family doctors they are so cool, I could in theory take all of us to him since he's not a GP he's a Family Doctor). So I park and walk in talk to someone, I get Nikki... I love this lady! I explain my dilemma and she solves it... the computers were down so I had to call back to get appointments but they can place the tests.

They placed the tests altho one of my children needed 4 people to help her hold still. I brought the ice to numb the area, told her to cough when they place the test, asked her to look away so she wouldn't be so frightened. Nope... screaming was heard by all... funny thing is the nurse couldn't place it while she was freaking. She finally looked away, and stopped screaming, then the nurse placed the test. She's now finished, when she looked back she asked, when they are you going to do it? She was told she was done!  and yup you guessed it, she started screaming again...  Luckily she was already in my arms and I was prepared Thanks Karyn Purvis... I had her favorite sweet thing to drink and cookies...

Does holding her tight during the procedure qualify as structure, and feeding her after she had an massive dose of adrenals qualify as nurture??? I wonder...

Everything else went off without a hitch, the non screamer got her soda at home. ;-)

Test reading day rolls around and as per my kids doctors instructions I show up sans appointment for him to read the TB tests, he's not there... can you believe it... He's NOT THERE... Now I have nurses playing CYA... So Back to Nikki I go! She saves the day again and pops me in the system, lets the nurse read the tests and I now am holding in my hot little hands TB test results. Whoo hoo now on to step 2 putting the house on the market, which involves...  yup you guessed it MORE Paperwork..

On Mothers Day... I would rather go camping.

Mothers Day also corresponds to the same day I got to meet Sweet Potato. A huge thrill for me, :-)  it was Monday in India and Mothers day in the states. How exciting!!!

A dozen years later I still find my self wishing I were camping on Mothers Day.  In TX the weather is fantasic and not too many bugs.  The kids are happy and lots of freedom to explore and plenty of down time and quiet time and campy distractions to keep their minds occupied.

Holidays are just not really that fun in our house. I always wanted to be the Mom that decorated for each holiday, Shamrocks in March,  Hearts in Feburary etc.. I soon learned to greet holidays with trepidation. Holidays bring about thoughts of family and fun. At the same time they bring about thoughts of loss and grief.  My minds often boggles at the brains ability to handle duelisms.  I wonder how much at war are my children's minds on holidays? Experiencing happiness and joy to suddenly be ambushed by guilt and grief a few minutes later. How do they do it, and I often wonder what should my expectations be on their abilities to handle it.

This Moms day I planned a day of fun because gotcha day is often celebrated too. The mall for Sweet Potato and a game night (for the rest of us.) I had hoped the fun of the day would help keep her mood sweet. Yet through out the day her behavior was... shall we say... not so hot. My hubby even noticed! Even tho I was doing the high nurture, high structure, making compromises, saying yes, she was just not co-operating.  Looking back I realized we made a few mistakes today.  We ALL should NOT have gone to the mall. It should have been her alone with just one parent. Letting her revel in shopping is fine, but the whole family ended up getting annoyed with the time it takes for her to buy one shirt. I swear she tried on half the store. I think we gave her to big of an audience and to much choice.

Daddy should not have agreed to her napping while all the chores and party prep were being done.  When we don't give her work to do we are in-part saying "Hey you're a guest not a family member." The sly puss when given a pretty easy chore of putting away a few bags of party groceries just before the guest were due to arrive, actually disagreed with me for 10 minutes about where to put away the heavy whipping cream... Did you know all dairy products belong in the cupboard!!! Ya I'm not buying what your selling.   I kept asking her to: "Try it again cupcake." "Can you say that in a respectful tone of voice?"  Eventually I just resorted to asking her to say "Mom ya caught me being smarmy."  *sigh*  Then the carton finally got put in the fridge. with that quirky grin of hers. 

A late bed time became even later when she informed me of some things she was missing. So off to the pharmacy we went... When we got home she had a sensory melt down.  After we resolved the sensory thing. She got ready for bed. I came in to check on her and found her now gleefully using the things she just had a melt down over, looking up at me with a now guilt ridden look on her face while her mouth was insisting it was still a big bad awful sensory experience.  I just praised her "Woo hoo look at you overcome that fear! Thank you for trying, your doing a great job."
(She got so mad at me. I totally know why too :-P  afterwards when I was sharing the scenario with hubby I had to run the water so she didn't hear my peals of giggling.)

The original sensory issue could have totally been real, and now a few minutes later when her Fontal Lobe was no longer hijacked by her Amygdala, she could handle it. So I cuddled her, and after a few words I asked a simple question. "So if you played with that when I wasn't here does that mean you win and I lose?"
She said "Yes..."
"So catching you at it does that mean I get a point?"
She said "Yes." (I was this child... figuring this one out was so easy.... I just thought what would my teen brain be doing).
I held her tight and said "Oh honi if you over come this issue it's a win for you, and to set the record straight I can't win or loose in this game your playing because we'll honi I'm not."
She was confused "Not what?"
"I'm not playing your game." I replied as I kissed her and sent her off to brush her pearly whites.

But I realized the first thing I did totally wrong was:  I should have insisted on Breakfast IN Bed.

School update and an Official Announcement.

So I started the year with high hopes but needless to say my children are not co-operating. It looks like we will be schooling though the summer holidays this year. Its been a year full of "STUFF."

Our organization will soon be shifting and relocating a few miles east. We have been scrambling to prep the house to sell. I feel like I'm on that Love it or List it show. I now love my floors and altho I'm not fond of the new paint color "Tea and Honey"(aka beige) It does actually look great with the tile.

We also started the process to adopt again, after watching our friends successfully adopt via the new beginnings program at Gladney we decided why not ask God if that is ok for us. We have felt led to adopt again and are excited to watch God build our family. Needless to say I'm once again up to my ears in paperwork.  Can't wait for this batch to be done and over with.  I'm totally at a loss this time around as to how to write the photo book. How do I express, were open to what God wants for us but really would like to lower the estrogen level in the house by adding some boys. My poor Knight in Shining Armor is surrounded by females! I just need an idea and some time when I'm not totally burnt out with House, School, the Looming Moving, Project, and oh Yeah I have a wedding to co-ordinate for a friend... wait the last bit is so much fun it's a de-stressor in my life.  (It's going to be soooooooo cute.)

Well lately I have shifted Sweet Potato away from HOD for a bit *again* the program is so awesome Little Miss Sunshine is just tooling along but Sweet Potato is not responding as well as she could be to the looming stress. I'm starting every day with an unco-operative child and taking the time to be present has resulted in some changes.

1. We're doing only the basics TX requires.
2. I've shifted her to books that she can read and are also free on Librivox so she can read and listen at the same time.  Seeing a much greater retention in what she has been reading/listening too.  I can hear Jan Bedell's voice (Little Giant Steps), saying Input Input Input.
3. We started a gentle approach to algebra and heaven forbid she likes it! This is on top of Singapore math, I want to be sure with our flip flipping into and out of Math You See, Visual Math from LGS, and back into Singapore that we are not missing anything she should have learned. Since Singapore uses a loose spiral we should be covering anything she missed on the the way up.
4. I'm working on her Handwriting its been getting sloppy again.
    I've added back in art, requiring her to draw images that she is reading about, map making etc.
5. Vocabulary, vocabulary vocabulary!

I'm not completely happy with the amount of school work she is doing. I wish I could get her to complete more subjects in a day, but she is now able to complete the work and is not as discouraged about school. In-fact today I saw her multiply 4 x 14 in her head. At this point I'm happy to see any forward momentum in her schooling, she doesn't do "change" well,  and even if she just stood still and didn't loose ground I'd be satisfied. Considering all the stress we have coming up in the future...   I've also added back in worksheets she likes to do like word searches, (Those things would take me hours to do she takes 10 minutes to do.)  this seems to help her self worth and builds a positive attitude toward school.  Personally I do not like worksheets, I think the The CM method is so much better for building character, critical thinking etc. but if a worksheet a day is looked forward too... well you betcha I'll be sticking one in the middle so she has a bright spot. :-)

I Did a Bad Thing...

Yup I did, my last post was about how busy and active I have been. How I have no time to blog because I feel great! Anyone want to print those words out and put them in a pie for me to eat? Why did I post how good I felt? It was like painting a great big "shoot me now" X on my back.

So heres a cute photo of me and some cookies in Mexico and if you don't want to read about feminine issues you should stop now...  no really if it grosses you out stop now.

Really I'm warning you... I'm going to be keeping it real...


Ah I'm now waiting on the doctor's blood test results to figure out if I'm anemic again. What took 6 months to overcome it takes Aunt Flo weeks to undo. Now I fall asleep if I sit down for a few moments and I can't seem to spell.  I know this too will pass but really can it stop now??? Pretty please... Funny it's happened before you know, once I went to give blood at a blood drive and they freaked out at me. That's when I discovered Aunt Flo was not supposed to visit for 6 weeks. DOH!

My doctor was looking in my records "Oh so hmmmm what did we do last time?" We sent you for tests discovered we can find nothing wrong and oh look we did nothing and it stopped on its own.  Can you see the irony on my face? I'd bang my head against the wall but I'm too tired too.   Ever feel like going to the doctor is a waste of time?  He didn't give me anything to resolve the problem with out tests because its all relative. (Don't get me wrong my Dr. is very sweet he's doing the best he can with the info at hand. It's not his fault my body behaves it self every time he tests it. )

I wonder maybe I should start weighing things, give him real data he can use.  Really how can he diagnose how bad it is with what I have to tell him? Let me think... I say "it's a lot." What is "a lot?" to me it is too graphic to describe here... maybe I should have used the words XXXXXXX XXXXXXX  Himmm... I can't say that on my blog...
One of my children freaked out over "a lot" and I was like ho hum you ain't seen nothing yet honi... Why are they're no guidelines on the packages of products.  It would be better than "have a happy period" sayings printed on the pad wrappers. (What were they thinking????) Think how helpful the manufacture could be if they actually made a chart. If it looks like A it has absorbed x amount. pics for B. C. D. E... Start taking Iron pills now, and F hey time to visit your doc cause your not normal. 

I often wonder if this stuff happened to men what would be going on??? Would they hospitalize them? Tell them its all in their heads? Tell them to tough it out? Maybe men wouldn't be so delicate and squeamish. Yo I'm loosing pounds here how can I buff up if I have no red blood cells?

How does one ask for prayer?  Yes lets call the prayer chain and say Aunt Flo has come to stay and she won't leave...  In one of Michael Palin's trips around the globe he stopped by a nepali village, where the ladies get to go to a special house for their "moon" days.  Hubby gets to keep the kids and fend for himself till she's over them.  Then he has to make her a special meal and feed her before she gets to go home. My Knight in Shining Armor was watching and he looked at me and said good thing we don't live in Nepal, I'd never see you!! I could just set up shop there and be hostess.  The good thing is: I have access to iron supplements. Once my doctor thinks I'm sick enough I can get help.  Once years ago this went on for 8 weeks but I was just in range and "not" anemic that doctor was like "Oh well live with it, the tests say your fine stop freaking out ... Sigh...

But what about ladies in places like India  where rates of anemia are 42%-60% depending on where you live. Eeep! I don't have to worry my hubby is going to eat up all the food and leave me with scraps. No instead he will make dinner, cherish me and care for me everyday. (and bring me chocolate) So even tho today is a icky day I will be grateful to be here in the states, with a man who cares for me, will happily shoulder the burden of the kids, and the house, on top of his work load till I'm better. Of course if you want to help you can pop over and fold laundry... and we like Chinese takeout.  If you do come over bring tissues cause I'll cry all over you because you love me. :-)
I really do love the United States of America, I'm so happy I was born here *sniffle* where are my tissues. Oh my! Hormones!

So Busy

Well the last few months I have been endeavoring to drop a few pounds and my life has been full, full, full.  My energy level has been so much higher this past year and I really feel like my Sarcidosis is completely gone. Not a whisper of a symptom since my second visit to the naturopath.  Now that I'm not tired and fatigued, now that I'm blocking out time to exercise, and taking on new projects I discovered I have less time to blog. Oopsie :-)

So here is an update to our lives, we had a amazing visit with my parents down in Mexico, Spirit airlines got us there on the cheap, and we packed super light. I kept thinking while on vacation "Is this so much fun because  I have only a little stuff to take care of?" Although we did have to bring Sweet Potatoes vest which I think weighed more that both bags put together... The airline let it ride for free because I called and checked, found out they are sticklers and managed to get a doctors letter proving the equipment was medically necessary.  I'll give Dr Lie 2 thumbs up for coming through in a crunch.  He is awesome.

The Sun and Sand and REST we got was so needed. I'm not complaining and I feel so bad for the frozen north, but here in Texas by March we usually have flowers and sunshine... Instead it's been overcast and dreary. Usually at this point of spring I'm asking God to help me appreciate the sunshine and never lose the wonder of sun and flowers in February or March.  Well I think I'm appreciating all those wonderful warm spring days in February we have had in the past decade.  In fact I'm missing them terribly.

School is tooling along I've moved Sweet Potato to a more accommodated version of school and reduced her schedule to focus her and to help her complete school on time. She is happier and I'm flabbergasted at the things she retains. Two nights ago at dinner she started talking about the revolutionary war and lady soldiers who choose to fight like a man. It's good to know it's in there!  I just shifted her reading to listening and reading at the same time. Her retention rate went way up, her writing of details got even better. Her report on the chapter was detailed and she actually had more than 100 words to write out. She reported to me that it was easy... I almost fell off the wii fit in surprise.  Tho today she has the stomach bug that has been going around, she looked miserable yesterday and today she is far to eager to convince me she is STILL REALLY SICK. Can you hear her say it "Really mom I am."  She is far more enthusiastic than she was yesterday about her illness.  I'm letting her stay on the couch and suck on ice chips all day long, but I think I'll make her do some math and reading today before any movies. Ah the perils of homeschooling, you have to be really sick to get out of "home" work.

Ok I have piles more to say, but my time is up and I needs must move on to math with my child... at least it's easy geometry and fractions. I love spacial math.

Bacon Flavored Lip Balm???

Ahhh it seems like it has been forever since I blogged.  Christmas prep, parties and focusing on my heath to get back in shape have drawn me far away. Now if I could find a way to blog while playing my latest wii fit game I would be golden. 

Since my eldest was 11 years old she has been begging to wear makeup. I never really wore makeup I think my dear sister has something to do with it. I associate makeup with having to pee and standing outside the bathroom saying "Are you done yet!! I really need to use the bathroom."  Also at some point I discovered the type of boy I liked didn't like make up. So I have been the unmade up fresh and clean, who cares about the dark circles under my eyes kinda girl. 

Needless to say I don't get the point of make up. I feel true beauty is in the heart. Luke 6:45 has been my touchstone of this. "A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of."  For me this also means your beauty comes from your heart not from what you put on your face… I Feel totally fine if you wear makeup this is my journey here… I don't expect others to feel the way I do. But think of how much more money I've had to spend over the years on chocolate… 

So ages ago Hubby decided to decree no makeup till your 16, which I am totally fine with. Sweet Potato has been very very unhappy about this. The minute she became a teenager (in her eyes) at 12 she has been dying to wear makeup can't you just hear the "because that is what teenagers do MOM! Duh!"  So after finding Sweet Potato attempting to make her lips shiny with strips of bacon… think what a brilliant flavor for lip balm! her using things like coconut oil as eye shadow - we decided to feed the need in hopes that it will take away the mystery.  

Dad laid out the ground rules:
Makeup only in the house, you may "learn" to use it before you actually officially wear it. 
You have to pay for makeup yourself. 
It must be hypoallergenic, because you are allergic to everything. 
You have to find someone to teach you to wear it, because Mom is clueless. 

So this Saturday off we went to spend Grandma's Christmas Cash on presents "From the MALL Mom I need MALL things."  She begged we use it for makeup… No problem the first store a Beauty Store outside the actual mall was quite willing to sell her anything,  but they were very expensive and the foundation alone was more than we had in Christmas Cash.  Now before we got into what to wear the aesthetician explained she needed to take care of her skin and tried to sell us a 100$ exfoliation package. She also told her not to wear eye shadow, as she is too young.  We did manage to get a basic blush and lip gloss.  

Off we went to Macy's where the lady behind the counter sat her down and said "How old are you?" "14! that is too young to be wearing makeup! Darling you need to take care of your acne, how often do you wash your face. etc. etc." She totally discouraged my daughter from wearing makeup. Much to Mom's delight! She also tried to sell us a complete kit of acne care. She then went on to tell my daughter that she would sell her makeup in 2 years. (I was dying inside I had to turn my head so she couldn't see me laugh with my eyes). 

We did a bunch of shopping and Sweet Potato wanted us badly to try one more store so into Dillards we went to see if they had a foundation that would match her creamy cafe-o-lait skintone. Here the sweetest 20 something took my dd by the hand and asked her tons of questions. Told her if she had blush and lip gloss she was all set, and that foundation would just add to her acne problems. Instead Sweet Potato need's a clean and smooth canvas to start with. She taught her how to clean her face and only wanted to sell me 2 reasonable and basic products.  Sweet Potato got so excited to clean her face this way… I caved in… and bought them. The sales person was also happy not to sell me the moisturizer since were all ready using coconut oil.  Way to go Dillards! Now that is customer service.  

Sweet Potato is happily washing her face like it's the best thing in the world and has had numerous people tell her she is way to pretty to need makeup.  Things I have been saying for years.  I am really grateful to the sweet aesthetician's that reinforced the messages;
A. You don't need makeup to look beautiful,
B. You are already beautiful, and
C. You need to wash that pretty face.

For me this was God helping me parent. We caved on the makeup partway, because we thought our little girls heart was hardening towards us on the makeup issue.  Yet God took care of the messaging, she heard from many people on how pretty she looks without makeup. She walked away from stores without buying makeup because they didn't want to sell to a child. How better to show her that her mom has good advice than to get the exact same advice from complete strangers? So thank you God! I appreciate it. 

*disclaimer* I get no money from amazon links and I have never used or bought bacon flavored lip balm. 

Handmade Christmas Part 2

Today I made some yummy treats to hand out at Christmas. I love this recipe so much I'm going to share it.

Pecan Honey Spread 

1 cup Honey Raw 

1 cup Pecans bits not the whole ones but the chopped up pieces

1 1/2 teaspoon of Orange Zest (organic if you can) 

1 teaspoon of cloves (fresh ground). 

Mix together pour into cute jars, put a lid and a label on them and you have a tasty spread for your toast or bagel. I got the idea from Williams-Sonoma Cook book but I like my version better. 

We made cute hair bows and strung some beads to build some gifts for cousins and local friends. 

I also got to spend the afternoon cutting out christmas cookies with my friend M. The cookies taste fantastic but did not keep their shape. So we will be trying again next week, but that is the beauty of getting my Christmas done early. One bad batch is not going to flip me out we have plenty of time to complete our appointed tasks. 

A Beautiful Girlhood

Well we just reach week 5 in our meanderings through our Resurrection to Reformation curriculum. So this isn't a week in review but I can't wait any longer.  Were only on page 27 of A Beautiful Girlhood, but I love love love this book. Carrie always picks bible study books that focus on character. I do find the book to be a bit dated in it's wording but when I read aloud I just update the language on the fly (bad me I know).  Yet the questions it asks us to discuss are wonderful.  I found we have to set the timer or we just sit and talk about the study for an hour.  The questions really help my kiddos to examine what motivates them and why they are behaving the way they do. It's funny I have a phrase I say a lot "You can wait impatiently and angry or you can wait patiently and happy, but in the end you are going to wait."  The books brings up the same principle all the time.  Our character is an out-pouring of our heart and choices we make.

I gave the girls a scenario, if they could make a skirt any color, any style what would it look like? They both described short skirts one knee length blue and frilly, one mid thigh and covered in animal prints. I then asked them if either of these skirts would be acceptable in say a Amish household? They blanched "No Mom they couldn't wear either of these!" Ok how bout here at home?  Well one was not acceptable here either... Why? Discussion about chocolate cake ensued. It all led back to our choices and how we see ourselves. Why does one of my girls think super short skirts are an option anyway? I have a funny feeling it's the hormones that have been turned on in her brain,  while her prefrontal cortex has not yet caught up.  I keep thinking this too shall pass.

We All Need a Little Respect.

I've been trying to implement 2 pieces of advice that we received during our TBRI training. Part of me thinks that during implementation they appear to be contradictory. I must be doing some of it right because she is now consistently coming to me for comfort asking for help, and seeking loving touch. 

The first one is; Stop bad behavior at the source by requiring respect.  Respect is the key, any and all disrespect is jumped on not allowed. It really is the beginning of all bad behavior. When we treat each other with respect bad behavior just disappears. It really works!  I've totally stolen Mike and Amy's line "Can you say that in a respectful tone of voice?"  I think I must have said that 20 times the first day back from Allume, and 10 times the second day back. It's quite funny as most her responses the first day back was "No I can't." upon which I replied "Maybe you should reconsider saying it." or I gave her a polite way to say what she was trying to express.

The second thing I have been working on is being Sweet Potatoes cheerleader. So often in our relationships with our adopted children they feel like they cannot be loved because birth mom "gave them up" "abandoned them" they feel deep down inside there must be something wrong with them.  This shows up in relationships as behavior that pushes people away rather than drawing them in.  This has been so hard this last week because of what I have dubbed the one thing leading to another principal.

I grab the Ipad to watch some Netflix while I work on handmade Christmas presents. I find it is on youtube. Ergo someone was using the Ipad for access to youtube, and the last person to use it was Sweet Potato.  I don't let my kids watch youtube, have you seen the risque positions they put legos in? So I sit down and have a talk with Sweet Potato who admitted to not playing minecraft but instead as soon as no one was watching switching over to youtube and looking up celebrities.  Now for all of you who think I'm being a helicopter mom... the conversation led to her being upset that she found in her words "Gross pictures of Legolas" and "I want to watch the movie White Hot with Mark Hamill in it."  When in reality the movie is called The Big Red One, and she's never expressed an interest in WWII history before how odd...

So after that discussion I return to my project and Netflix only to discover shows Mom has declared off limits were watched during our absence. *sigh* can I just go bang my head against a wall.  Checking with the sitters, one of them was agast as the girls assured her they were mom approved shows they were Disney shows, they weren't disgusting... or anything. The main problem being, is when my children observe these shows the themes of parents learn lessons from children, father figures who are bumbling idiots that can't find their own toes without help, and parent acknowledges the child's superiority of intellect, money management, behavior, open mindedness etc. seeps into their hearts. They actually start to say and act out the lines from the shows.  Which brings us back to Mom having to jump on bring into the light all disrespect. So back out I go to chat with both my children about character issues...

How much work did I accomplish on my Christmas project??? next to nothing, but hopefully I got through to my childs heart.

Thrift Store Christmas Dress Hacks

OK so I'm terrified of satin, silk, taffeta, all the if you poke them with a pin they get snagged fabrics, which is why I have never even tried to make my kids christmas party dresses out of these fabrics. I have been known to make them out of cotton and make them look like Laura Ingalls. This year in my desire to have Christmas done early, yesterday as I was waiting for our Christmas photos to print... I thought hey lets run down to the thrift store and see what they have... it's not prom season when the price of prom dresses rises to 30$ and it's not really time for buying a Christmas dress... so off we went.  After looking in the wrong rack and finding some things we might be able to hack. Little Miss Sunshine found the RIGHT rack full of taffeta, and satin.

We grabbed all the size 1 and size half and even a size 8 and ran into the changing room. Little Miss Sunshine fell in love with a electric blue dress that was 2 sizes too big. Sweet Potato just loved the softer green size 8 Jessica Mcclintock. Both were strapless dresses and both girls insisted the dress be tight tight... meanwhile Mom said it was ok only if I could make straps for each dress. Really who wants to be tugging your dress back into place all evening????

I tried to document how I took 2 dresses that were the wrong size and made them fit.  This was much easier because they are strapless, if the dress you pick has sleeves you may need a much bigger hack...

So here is the dress we found, first I put it on her inside out and then basted tucks on the inside. She is standing on a footstool in her "high" heel shoes. 

Once I figured out the hem I marked it. 

 I cut it very carefully! 

Then I trimmed the under dress. 

 From the scraps of trimmed skirt I measured out straps. 

 After I sewed the seam I edged it with zigzag to keep it from fraying. 

Then turn them inside out, use a safety pin and a chopstick. 

I attached the straps with hand sewing, due to the lace up back this dress

was very easy to hack into fitting well.

Here it is all finished. Easy peasy! 

Here is the soft green dress before we started. It is too loose and and way to long. 

Sorry for the bad photo but here is the hack all hemmed to a new length,

I made twisted straps so it won't fall down on her.

I also was able to take it in, in such a way I can let it out later

so maybe she will have this dress for a longer time than just one season. 

Not bad for $12 I'd say. 

A Handmade Christmas

Not all my gifts will be hand made this year as we have decided Christmas is not an emergency and we have been donating to our Christmas envelope for a few months now. Many of my friends actually prefer handmade consumable gifts, they see them as a thoughtful gift made with love that will not need to be dusted in the future. So I thought I'd share a few gifts I am making, I won't show it all so the person getting it will still be surprised. I'm also going to give a shout out to the Prudent Homemaker who also has great handmade gift ideas (and No she did not pay me to link her up I just think she is fabulous.)

I decided to do a set of seasonal cards. I have a bag of cards left over from our adoption announcements so many years ago, I found them when I was cleaning. I also have one last big piece of watercolor paper, and all the leftover watercolors from CTC that are just begging to be played with.

So I measured my blank cards and my paper and cut my watercolor paper up into (for me) tiny pieces that will fit on the card fronts. 

I then drew a tree because what is easier than a nice landscape with a lone tree... 

I then used a piece of tracing paper (ok I'll be honest it was velum because I can't find the tracing paper), to trace my tree I used my pencil to shade in the back so when I trace it on to my other watercolor papers  the tree will have the same general shape 

Don't forget to add some kind of registration mark! I marked the corners of the paper so when I laid it down to trace I could keep it in the same place for every card. 

Ok here I have 4 all done you can do more than 4 but this is how many I managed with my card size.  I planned on a piece of paper what each card will look like. I took a few ideas from these posts 

http://gardenforsara.blogspot.com/2013/02/ctc-unit-21-watercolor-tutorial.html

http://gardenforsara.blogspot.com/2012/10/ctc-watercolor-tutorial-unit-12.html

and it helped tremendously to know what each season was going to look like in my head before I started. 

Using a small piece of tape I made a moon taped it down and then did a wet on wet color wash of a winter night. Notice I stopped at my horizon line. I have taped these down via the back not the edges, since they will be glued to the cards in the end I can flatten them out then. 

After it dried I pulled off the tape and added yellow shading to the moon. painted in the tree in black, then hit the bottom with white paint, added a quick shadow and then shook the salt shaker over the drying white paint to add a 3D snow effect. You need to work quickly so the salt will stick. 

Here is my background for spring. I dropped in some white clouds over the top of the sky. 

Add the tree in brown and let it dry. 

Now I added in bright green leaves by dabbing with a nasty ol' paint brush  the kids had destroyed. Add some spring flowers, I'm not sure if they are daffodils or yellow tulips, but they do make this image look like spring!  You could also add white blossoms to the tree if you wanted to make it an apple, dogwood etc.  I also did a green wash up from the bottom over the top of the yellow underpainting. 

Here is my background for summer but alas the finished product photo is unusable and I already wrapped the present, so I'm going to leave the rest to your imagination. Add in a brown trunk and use a darker green  

for the leaves. I added dots of yellow to the grass to be dandelions. 

For fall I picked a stormy day, after I had mixed up some grey blue paint and did a wet on wet color wash I used a dry brush to soak up some of the wash. Then used a wet brush to drop in some clouds. When it had dried a bit I added some white to the clouds and some more of the dark wash to edges. I love how it turned out. To get the fall grass look I under painted a light brown and then went over it with the leftover summer green wash. See how it gives it a more fuller color. 

I painted in a few extra limbs on the tree as if the tree had actually grown during the seasons. Using my paintbrush I dabbed in leaves on the tree. Use yellow, orange, and red and don't worry if the colors get a bit mashed together. I then used my brush by dabbing to makes blowing leaves as if the wind was carrying away the leaves. 

After they were all done I glued them to the cards, be sure to weigh the drying cards down with books so they dry flat. Don't forget to sign and date your art work! Wrap and give. 

Nothing New Under the Sun

So about a year ago my Husband and I realized we had been sucked into renting movies off of iTunes to the tune of "Too Much Money!"  We decided getting streaming Netflix would be a much cheaper option, as long as we stuck to watching what was available (and hopefully good). We don't have cable and I'm fairly appalled at the commercials on TV and cable anyway.

I'm at that place where I'm realizing T.V. is an opiate, a great tool for distraction and as bad as Facebook for sucking up time. It's an awesome tool when your sick, but I really don't want to sit through 15-20 minutes of commercials when watching a show.  So we are loving Netflix.

This weekend was the GFA Renewing Your Passion conference, a very busy week leading up to it and I had very little to do. PTL as my husband was a way and that week is another blog post.. oh boy it's a doozy. 

So Sunday after the conference was over and we were dog tired. Hubby and I decided to watch a few movies, I looked up reviews and chose The Naked City. This movie produce in 1943 (I think), was amazingly good. Al tho it is methodical and accurate it also was hilariously campy at times. You have to love early acting, no emote more Please! It is so funny to watch. So forgive the staged screams and the soft focus with the crooning in the background. Knight in Shining Armor and I kept saying "Oh man this is so like CSI."  I kept thinking "Man this crime would be so much more easier to solve if they had better equipment." Yet despite the lack of technology they still follow the same order and method of solving the crime that is in use on CSI today.

I love how it was the "Reality TV" of the time. The extras were actually all real New Yorkers just living life.  I kept thinking how thankful I am I don't have to wear a wool suit, and we have air conditioning. They kept complaining of the heat and opening windows (without bars oh my!) on the 4 and 5th floors.  It really shows the the era before OSHA and when they believed people had enough common sense not to jump out windows. Open staircases, and a lack of HIPPA made things so much easier to investigate. Pharmacists and nurses kept saying enough information for the patients to experience identity theft in today's society. Oh how rules have changed so much since then, but people's behavior really hasn't. I give it a thumbs up!

Since that one was so much fun I picked another one with rave reviews:

His Girl Friday
How can you go wrong it has Carry Grant in it. Many people reviewed this as a funny movie with non stop laughs.  I would review it as 10 stupid things woman do to mess up their lives. The song Good Girl by Carrie Underwood should be Hildys' theme song.  Not that I liked Hildy the lead female character that much. The story opens immediately after she has gotten a Reno divorce, and is going to be married the next day. It totally admits she must have had an affair while married. Grants character Walter is a smelly weasel type, I was rooting for Bruce the man she was going to get married to in Albany. He fit the bill for Mr. Steady, hey Hildy take it from me, marrying a Mr. Steady is totally worth it.  Walter on the other hand needs to be investigated for fraud, and libel.  He's a nasty user of people I did not like him. The many times Walter manipulated poor Bruce into getting arrested, just made me wish Hidly had tendered her resignation by letter and this movie had never happened. Hildy is so well qualified I don't understand why she doesn't see her own potential, she could totally be the big fish in the smaller pond of Albany. She could so start her own newspaper and become the Albany equivalent of Walter except with Bruce giving her a moral compass she might have a paper with integrity.  Instead she chooses to stay the cringing lap dog.  What a pity.

The side plot of the look at the power of the press was interesting. I'm not sure its worth watching just to look at that aspect tho. It is a good look at what the media has thought for years. Walter firmly believed he could control all the politicians by what he wrote, he could make or break a politician and put whom ever he chose in office. He was willing to trade away anything, this was not a man of high moral fiber. Wait I don't want to go to jail so I'll trade you "not exposing your corruption as long as you don't put me in jail for aiding a escaped criminal and ordering a kidnapping."  I could not find it funny the politicians wheeling and dealing while the newspapers make up stuff to sell more titillating papers either.  I hate to say it but the most likable character was the take no prisoners Bruce's mother (Hildys future mother in law), not only does she expose Walter and Hildys crimes she smacks down the kidnapper but good. For me to say my favorite character is an actor who has less than 5 minutes screen time tells you volumes about this film.

I feel this is not a comedy but a movie on how to stay in a manipulative, abusive relationship, and like it... I know I must be missing something. It must be a lost in translation or a you had to be there moment.  Maybe I'm taking it way too seriously but I could not like this movie, if anything it just made me sad because there is nothing new under the sun. Politicians are still acting like politicians the media is still just like this movie portrays.

I leave you with this bible verse...

Ecclesiastes 1:9

9 

What has been will be again,

    what has been done will be done again;

    there is nothing new under the sun. 

Res to Ref Units 2-3

Were taking it slow but were still having "issues" or should I just say problems and be upfront and real about it... Most of the problems are with attitudes and complaining about the work load... and were going  half speed here folks... We are also doing Logic of English which is sucking up time! but teaching my kiddos things about words they really need to know. esp since they are ESL speakers. I'm learning neat things too  like the ay/ ai sounds isn't just for Fonzi...  and who knew that the "ay" is always at the end, in english words anyway.

Math Practice #3 in the textbook was our math today. I reviewed how to do each problem, and they did all these problems well for the past few days as we have been studying them. Yet when confronted with a whole page Sweet Potato lost it... I had made plans for her to be overwhelmed by the textbook approach... and had written them all down for her in a worksheet format with plenty of lines and spaces. So they were not to overwhelming... it was as if all I reviewed got mixed up. She treated division like multiplication, crossing off zeros where she should be retaining them, and  keeping zeros where she should be crossing them off because they are superfluous.  I think the crowning (ironic) glory is I'm typing this while Little Miss Sunshine  is scrambling to finish her math ( I gave her the same worksheet format) she's been waiting on her sister for a good 30 minutes. (Looking a wee bit smug too! ) the ol' I finished before you did "look."  When I went to grade the papers she had missed a whole page of problems. Part of me finds this highly amusing. We are now waiting for her to finish.  She's got that oopsie I fell from grace look and is in that mad scramble to finish quickly.  

I find it so odd that they got all mixed up on the easy problems and then did just fine on the 300-15/3x2 =?
doing all the operations in the correct order its just 15/3 followed by 1500/30 leading to 15000/3000 these types lead you down the garden path! yet they are having the most trouble with them. Oy vey! Hey Kids! just because it has a bunch of zeros doesn't mean you need to add extra.

The note books are looking good and I'm loving how were touching on Shakespeare not so much they are getting overwhelmed, just enough to get them interested.  The science has been fun and they seem pretty interested in Mercury.  I was dying laughing  reading Sweet Potatoes answer to why Mercury has craters, apparently she thought the sun burned holes in it.  The experiment corrected her thinking.

Discovering Music is really interesting although it does add about an hour to our day I like having a format to introduce music to my children.  My Knight in Shining Armor is a musician but like how the shoemaker's kids never having any shoes, Hubby too never seems to have time for lessons. I would love for him to discover a love for music in his children as well! It's fun to do the listening time and hear a cross section of 200 years worth of music in an hour or two.

They are now happily moving on to making music posters for our school room.

So far we have had school start on time, and finish on time!! and amazingly my dawdler has been finishing within the allotted time and working alone though the independant time.  *happy dance* I hope it lasts for a good long time.

Desperate Women

Dr. Desouza came and spoke at Tuesday night prayer meeting. He was pretty clear and concise about the plight of women in India and other surrounding countries. Ever since the sentencing of the men this past week tension has been high and all eyes in India are looking at the mindset of Asia toward women.
If you want more info we have some resources here and viewpoints of India here.

I came across this article on the ratio of men and women in India, (LINK) it is interesting to read that even the people of India can see the need for change. Infanticide of girl babies needs to stop.   When you consider the point of view of the family a girl baby is not going to care for her parents when she is older, Instead a dowry must be raised and that can be a crippling cost, (Dowry was outlawed in 1961 yet people are still asking for it and paying for it.) the culture overall places more value on boys than on girls.  

I recall a conversation I had with my Hindi teacher (high caste Hindu)  in New York over 12 years ago. We were discussing dowry and she mentioned bride burnings... What the heck is bride burning? I thought.  She went on to talk about this law that was put in place 1986 to stop the practice.  My mind was reeling as she explained how some families profit by repeated marriages.  So they had to put a law in place that says essentially if your wife dies under suspicious circumstances within the first 7 years her family can ask for the dowry back.  We discussed how it's ok for the husband to burn his bride and then remarry, get another dowry and improve his lifestyle.  My mind was boggling! Her view was it was better to have boys because they are safely under your eye.  

Heres what (with my western mindset) I do not get... Ok girl babies are being aborted, boy babies are better, men can murder their wife and its often ignored and can remarry but ladies who's husbands die are cast out and not allowed to remarry.  Talk about a double standard!  Am I the only one thinking this is going to lead to a shortage of females?  Yet the practices continue, Ladies in India are starting to speak up for themselves but in such a male dominated society, the only way to reach them is through other ladies.

I think this is one reason why when my husband first shared Revolution in World Missions with me and I jumped on the website I looked first to see if they had woman missionaries, and they did! That really mattered to me. You know Jesus elevates women, his treatment of the woman at the well, Mary sitting at his feet and how he handled the woman caught in prostitution (Where is the guy in that story anyway?) all point to a God who loves us and values us for ourselves.

I can see how Sweet Potato was listening to Dr. Desouza, It certainly did not look like she was at the time. She has been struggling all day with thoughts of her birth father. We know so little of her story and it's hers to tell so I can't share it here, but she thinks and thinks "What kind of a man was he who fathered me?"  When people share how tough it can sometimes be to be a woman in India. She spirals into the unknown.  I so wish I had answers for her and I so wish she would just be grateful to be in a safe loving home. eh we can't have everything... Someday I hope she gets answers to her questions, and until then I pray for the peace of God to fill all the lonely corners of her heart.

Doing Hard Things

Today I was reading Matthew chapter 7 13-14

Go in through the narrow gate. The gate to destruction is wide, and the road that leads there is easy to follow. A lot of people go through that gate. 14But the gate to life is very narrow. The road that leads there is so hard to follow that only a few people find it.  

It made me think about something Sweet Potato has been saying a lot lately.  You see whenever school, chores or relationships become difficult she proclaims them "to hard" and stops trying.  When I encourage her to work harder, step up or just care about her schooling. She just whines and moans "Its Toooo Hard I just want to do easy things." Where in the world did she get that from this is sooo not us. She has been having a poor attitude toward school for a while. We have turned a corner and it's getting better but it's been a rough couple of weeks.  I have found sticking the consequence of detention for being late (going to bed early) and suspension for 5 tardys (getting grounded all day Saturday or Wednesday and doing chores), requiring all her work to be turned in by 4pm or it was an automatic zero this was to stop the doing school from 9am -8pm daily dawdle , (a zero in the grade books means the itouch is now confiscated for 24 hours), got her attention.

Part of me did not want to dig out the consequential parenting tool from my tool box, but Time In's and talking reasonably about it were just not working. I wonder if this falls under the "high structure" requirement she needs as a sensory overloaded adopted child. Homeschooling can often be relaxed and loosey goosey. In one way it is helpful, as you can focus on the needs of the child, allow them to grow into the work if needed, but I think for Sweet Potato she needs more structure than I was providing. Once I started enforcing the detention missing prayer meeting OH MY! and re-explaining how her tardiness affects the entire school day for everyone. Then I restructured the school schedule, added disincentives to fail, and it seems to have pulled school back from frustrating to workable. Sad to say I can't say "joy" yet but my hope is in Christ :-)

I saw this  Fox News snippit on a new book that shows authoritative parenting produces higher grades made me remember all my training from the Monroe's at our church  and I felt better about my parenting goals in no way have I arrived :-) this is a journey... 

I have been training and turning over responsibility of remembering to take your medication to Sweet Potato. Were in the "Trust but Verify" stage of this process, in 3-4 years I hope to not have to worry about the verify part, because ultimately it's not my body, it's her body, and she needs to self care.  It's all part of my ultimate plan for my child to grow up and out. For her to be able to do that means I need to share power with her and allow her to fail, make mistakes and get messy. I think homeschoolers in general do the last 2 really well and the first one not so well.  So I'm trying a new approach; allowing failure to be an option. So now she can fail in a safe environment all the while knowing I still believe she can do it and I'm here to help all she needs.

CTC Help for Unit 2

Roll out your cylinder as per instructions in book. 

I didn't have wax paper so I used a light colored construction paper make a piece that fits your cylinder 

 I'm using my drawing marker it will bleed through. 

 Flip it over, see the backwards writing? 

 I'm enhancing it for you. 

 Wrap around your soft clay. 

 I taped mine it keeps it steady. 

 This did not work well, not even with wax paper. See my needle, I have an alternative solution. 

Use your needle to poke holes through the paper,
then take it off , scribe in the letters and symbols with your pencil. 

All done. you may need to re-roll your cylinder occasionally to help it keep it shape.
Let dry and roll into wet clay and you will be able to read it. 

itouch Trouble

Well we did 2 weeks at half speed and last week Auntie was here trapping me in the house. Meanwhile this week we have rebooted school but slowly. I'm finding it difficult to get Sweet Potato motivated. She just wants to play with her itouch all day long.  I thought we had it under control but Obviously it's not... I've been listening to Pandora for over a year and never once have I seen what I saw today. This morning disaster occurred Pandora cut off her free music. Oh the horror! To listen anymore this month she has to Gasp! PAY! cries of "Mom pay it, Mom please... " "Well dear do you have any money?" "NO but Mom its only .99 cents!"  "Yup it is, do you want to do some chores?"  "NO." "Well then I don't feel like paying either."  I'd like to personally thank the makers of Pandora for building in safeguards. I couldn't have been happier. I know she's been using the itouch outside of the guidelines I gave her, and now it has caught up with her. I didn't have to harangue, or fuss, or nag, it just happened to her because of her actions. Ahhh life lessons I don't have to teach.

I did put consequence parenting in the back of the tool box, but its kinda fun to just see it happen without my intervention.

Meanwhile I'm disgusted with Disney and the music videos I walked in during Sweet Potatoes vest time and saw a half dressed Selena telling some dude when he was ready, to come and get it. Come and get dinner in that dress No I don't think so! Ah well the cute teen has grown up, but my teen is not ready for that. Her cries of "But daddy said I could." were acknowledged and daddy came and sat with her and watched the videos with her. Upon which he banned all but one.Thanks Dad :-) I like not being the bad guy tonight.  Bwahahahahahaha Sorry it just so funny he says sure watch the computer videos with out previewing them and then nearly has a heart attack at what Disney deems appropriate for teenagers. My nightly prayer is Oh Lord help us navigate these perilous years.

Painting Big is More Than Just Pictures

I love our CTC group on FB it really gets my blogging juices flowing.

Now as a Missionary Mama living "simply" I understand tight budgets Which is why I don't use the really expensive watercolor paper, I can still have my kids paint big without a crippling cost.   Please don't get me wrong I'm not being critical of you if you paint small. This post is more about me working out why I want shout from the mountain tops "Paint BIG!"  I'm not saying "feel bad" if you paint small, I'm just sharing why we don't paint small. This is my personal journal and I just let you read it. :-)

So here is my personal opinion as to why children should paint Big.

First of all children have a tendency to paint and draw small. If you give a child a regular sheet of paper they typically don't fill the entire page. They tend to stick their image smack dab in the middle and leave lots of space around it. When you look at many fine artists they fill the whole canvas/paper, even if only with doodles.

When you take a large piece of watercolor paper and place it in front of a child, it is a bit daunting. They think I have to fill whole big piece of paper! Yet the project usually starts out by painting a whole entire background. Painting large involves a mix of large and fine motor skills. The child must make decisions, when do I start changing colors?  How much pressure am I  putting on my brush? They see short strokes don't look at all like long even strokes. If a child has a 11x14 paper making long even strokes takes concentration and some finesse.  A 5x7 sheet of paper doesn't have these challenges, nor do large motor skills come into play on suchs a small surface.

I'm not against cutting down a 18 x 24 ---> 9 x 12 (to conserve resources) but let me challenge you to think outside the box for a minute. If you have good watercolor paper the front will not bleed through to the back. Yes the back is not as rough but I would rather my children painted both sides of a sheet of  decent sheet of watercolor paper then paint small. Why I'm wondering in my mind why am I obsessed with painting big. I'm really really happy you are painting even if it is on 5 x 7 pieces of paper. Painting big resonates deep within my soul if I could I would shout from the mountain tops "Paint Big."

I have one child that enjoys these painting but she hates to draw. She has fine motor control issues. When she has to draw in the tiny boxes in the notebooks, it frustrates her. She tires easily. Yet she likes to paint, because painting on a large surface uses a mix of muscle groups and I think tho I'm not sure a larger portion of her brain. I know art is a emotional centered activity, but fine detail work is a logic centered activity.  For me painting big means opening up and touching the emotions in art. Letting our feelings out on paper. I have kids with Trauma in their background, getting them to express feelings on paper through art or writing is sooooooo good for them.  Making sure painting is NOT a Fine Motor Skill ONLY project for her smoothed the way for success. There are plenty of her paintings that did not make the blog. This is because I did not have her permission to put them up.  Altho plenty did make the blog, those she was happy and satisfied with.  This created a cycle of success. That success builds her interior life of self worth, not self esteem but rather how God sees us as wonderfully and beautifully made people.

Art is Art if you the artist likes it in the end, that is all that really matters.

Now how often do our children not like their projects especially the age CTC covers. They are of an age where they can see in their minds eye what they want, but execution may be much harder to achieve. If you give them a tiny piece of paper to work on and they make mistakes you will hear "It's ruined."  Lets face it, on small paper, a drop of paint can be very hard to "repair or recreate" (fix it by turning it into something else), yet on a big piece of paper you have the real estate to fix it.

Part of me says when we give our children the "standard" 8 x 11 or smaller paper we are creating a mind set of normal = small.  If I was given a half size piece of paper I would think this is small and not as important. They already lean toward drawing and painting small. Small paper for me says the child will think small, inside the small box not big as in "The sky is the limit." mentality.  Great artists paint big... ok I know great artist also paint on the heads of pins, but you have to admit painting on a tiny head of a pin is huge idea.  Big paper forces a child to think larger and big thinkers turn into visionaries and leaders.

For me this is more than large/fine motor skill issue, its is paradigm shift in their brain. Creativity should think big, and in our house that means you get the biggest paper mom can afford. I want them to have goals and aspirations in life and I want my children to paint life on as big of a canvas as God has given them. I don't think I could ever hand my kids a 5 x 7 piece of paper to paint on. It goes against this deep philosophical place in my heart that is linked to dreams, goals, and aspirations.

Part of me likes that these paintings do not fit well within our binders and notebooks because great ideas often don't fit. Fred Smith the Fedex guy was told his idea was not realistic, but who do we use when it must be there overnight?   Tho if all I had was a few pieces of paper I'd rather use both sides of the paper or do fewer paintings, than cut them down, because for me that paper represents far more than an art project, it represents a mindset for life.