I do live in a fairly closed community at the ministry, if no kids are allowed the babysitting factor comes into play. As in "I had better set up a baby sitter as soon as possible or they will all be gone." Also having a Spectrum kid I hear more no's than yes's in a normal baby sitting situation. Weddings are even harder when there is a limited number of babysitters.
I think people don't get how easy a spectrum child can be to baby sit.. If you like I will send her DS/personal DVD player with her and she will sit in a corner and play it till I come for her. It's only if you expect her to interact with your children in a nurotypical way that you may run into issues. My friend C has discovered
this factoid and if she is available, will always taker her. Bless you C!
Of course some of the weddings eased the way for us and set up baby sitting in the same building. That was really nice!
Now Fridays' wedding they actually invited my children. Yippie! well maybe not :-/ No babysitting to deal with. On the other hand I had a day of being "Hair Dresser Mom." It was kinda like we were having a wedding here at our house. Little Miss Sunshine of the long straight hair. Begged and cajoled for Curls. When I sought out the curlers I could only find 4. Where are they? lost, broken and tossed. "Sorry Mom I tried to use them and I broke them" Oh Joy.. now do I splurge and go buy a curling iron? I decided not to on the grounds I have no idea on how to use one! and I'm sure I will do one or more of the following:
A. Burn my fingers.
B. Burn her scalp.
C. Fry her hair.
So I saved my cash and we used the 4 curlers all day long. Since her hair goes past her waist. I could only curl a small amount at a time. I got out some heavy duty curling mousse. It worked tho some of the curls were a bit hard, by the time the wedding rolled around they had relaxed. So I think I spent about 2 hours on her hair. I really need to have her buy me a new set at the dollar store.
Meanwhile I took a few "new to us" dresses into Little M. I helped her put the first one on. It was a great color (blue) for her. It was made of a non itchy, non scratchy, non soapy feeling fabric. Always an important factor in clothing for Little M! It made her look like a young lady eeeep! She is growing up! I could tell she LOVED this dress, she looked beautiful. I did a no no... I told her how pretty she looked. Bad Mommy I approved of the dress how dare I. Miss Oppositional jumped out of the wood work. She said " I hate this dress, it's loose around my legs I want it tight." Now since she has been playing "Laura Ingalls" for the last 2 weeks DAILY! wearing skirts that don't cling. I wasn't buying what she was selling. We tried on the other new dress and it looked ok, not as nice as the first one. And it had itchy fabric, but did she complain? noooooooooo! I look back and find it funny now, but at the time I have to admit I was so annoyed. *rolls eyes*
After a bit I talked to her about the "why" of the attitude. I'm always torn is it rebellion or adoption opposition, or a bit of both?? How to handle it??? Yesterday, I turned the tables on her and pointed out she had handed me all the control of "her" likes and dislikes at that moment. And personally I have enough responsibly and I don't want that much power. Since she loves to be in control this made her annoyed and confused. hahahahahah.... Sorry but the look of consternation on her face when I started telling her I love "all her favorite foods." Now she was wanting to hate them, quite the dilemma she had. It is rather funny. Eventually she
Now we come to straightening her hair. She asked nicely, I agreed as long as she brushed her hair. Even tho I'm sure I'm going to burn my fingers. Aunti has taught me how to do it, so I have some confidence I can do it. And her hair is thick with a stubborn natural wave, it would curl fantastically. So I ask her to brush her hair. She does a terrible job. In fact I can tell from the condition of her hair she hasn't bothered to bush the inside bit near her neck for about a week. Its been looking fine but I had to cut 4 nasty snarls out of it. I'm low on time before dinner, so I do my best to brush it without pain, but she screams bloody murder. So I say want me to cut it? NO! *tears* So I try again to get out the snarls gently. She screams like I'm killing her. So I cut it out *more tears* Because its her precious hair!
/start dream sequence
Her Knight In Shining Armor comes galloping in from outside (where he was grilling dinner) wielding a spatula Whoa Whoa My dear daughter are you in distress?
Little M: The Big Bad Mean Mommy with a hair brush is attacking me! she will cut my precious hair that has magical powers.
Hubby: But Dear Daughter how is this? Did you not put thyself into her hands to have thy hair magically straightened. Here let me wield the hair brush and save thee!
BBMM: But forsooth OH Champion of champions will not your meat burn to a crisp? Are you sure I'm not truly the fairy Godmother in disguise? I'm here to prepare her for her ball. You shall not wrestle this magic hair brush from my hand. As you can see Look! I have cut out the offending snarls. Now that the evil snarls are gone the brush flows freely through her hair once more.
Hubby: Ahh dear Lady you are correct... she is in no real danger. Yet the lamb! it may be charring as we speak! Knight In Shining Armor exits.
Little M: *pouts* But But My magical hair!
/end dream sequence.
25 minutes later her hair is straight and beauteous.
Now I have 40 minutes to get a shower get dressed myself... But... Hubby certain we will be "LATE!" if we don't leave in 15 minutes, when the location is 8 min away. By my calculations that gives us a 25 minute window to stand around and keep the kids from running in church. I scramble anyway and am ready in about 10 minutes. Ahh the joys of motherhood. I hope I looked ok I didn't even get to look in a mirror before I left.
As we leave it starts to pour. Yeah!!! we really really need rain here in TX. The Humidity level skyrockets... You can just imagine what happens to the hair styles, Curls become less curly and straight starts to frizz... Really you just have to laugh!!! Even tho I know it is normal for straight haired people to want curls and curly hair people to want straight. My heart really wishes they would be satisfied with the way God created them to be. Vanity of vanity all is vanity.